The Power of Peacemaking: Interrupting Aggression in Challenging Times

Many of us today are paying close attention to the aggression that’s arising in our world. Beyond US politics, we see similar fires breaking out in other nations. Scanning the news sets off alarm bells of anxiety. A return to various forms of fundamentalism and “tribalism” (in the negative sense) are gaining fuel and momentum. The Us […]

Malala Yousafzai: speaking truth neither exaggerating nor suppressing (VIDEO)

In her historic speech to the United Nations, 16 year old Malala Yousafzai demonstrates a perfect example of the mindful communication principle of “speaking truth, neither exaggerating nor suppressing.” Her words reveal that true power comes from reflecting our human experience as it actually is. If Malala cried for vengeance or focused simply on her own personal […]

On not throwing fuel on a fire

One of the greatest strengths of Mindful Communication is almost impossible to notice. It’s invisible. Silent. Effective. And it comes when things get really difficult. It’s the power of “Stopping when the Light is Red.” This means one deceptively simple thing: not throwing fuel on a burning fire. Mindfulness Means Remembering to Notice What is […]

The Antidote to McMindfulness is Feeling What We Feel

Zen teachers Ron Purser and David Loy’s recent article in Huffington Post critiques the way in which modern mindfulness teachings, when broken away from their “Buddhist roots,” could be misused. They call this teaching “McMindfulness,” noting that it could help people to engage in more disconnected and even destructive purposes, far from its intended focus on selflessness […]

The longevity of the words ‘I’ and ‘Thou’

Those that have taken our workshops have heard Susan Chapman speak about Martin Buber’s view of “I and Thou.” This view indicates that our conversation partners can be held in their full humanity (Thou, or “we-first”), rather than becoming an ‘It,’ which we only want to utilize to achieve our own aims. Interestingly, research has […]

Making Space for Reactive Emotions

When we work with the reality of The Three Lights, the Red Light of reactive emotions can seem especially challenging. Red indicates that the communication is blocked by any of the five basic patterns (ignoring, blaming, arrogance, grasping/addiction and power games). Of course, our most painful experiences with others generally fall into one or more of […]